I Heart Weeds

I was on a run earlier this week. It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining. There was a nice breeze. It was a little too hot, but I hadn't exercised for a couple of days in a row, so I felt really good despite the heat. The legs were happy to be moving, and it just felt wonderful to be running in general. I was having a great time, and then, I smelled something rather unpleasant. I was running by a beautiful house, well more like a mansion really, with an immaculately maintained lawn. The driveway had zero cracks in it, and there was a gait that opened to let cars onto the perfect cracks-don't-belong-here driveway. My mother refers to this house as Captain I-Don't-Know's house because when we were little we would always ask who lived there. Anyways, as soon as I smelled this, my throat wanted to close up. I took shallow breaths in hopes of getting away from it without breathing too much of the stench into my nostrils. I still managed to cough anyway. The only way I can think of to describe the smell is to say that it is a chemically deranged fresh cut grass smell. I immediately think of grass when I smell it, but not in a pleasant oh look at the pretty green grass kind of way. It's more like a Frankenstein grass smell, trying to be the real thing but turning out to be a grotesque imitation.

Well, needless to say I soon spotted the tell tale little white flags that inform people to keep small children and dogs off of the lawn for x number of days so they don't get POISONED! The Captain I-Don't-Know and his family apparently spray their lawn to eliminate those ugly little weeds that detract from perfection. I don't know about you, but when I run by a lawn that has been treated, I kind of become personally offended. I just absolutely abhor the smell, and of course, the only reason people treat their lawns is to personally offend me. The world revolves around me in case you weren't aware of this previously. On a more serious note though, I have a hard time wrapping my head around the idea of being willing to potentially harm children and small animals simply to have a lawn that to all outward appearances could be carpet. Is it really worth it? Are outward appearances really that important to you? Do other people really care what your lawn looks like? I mean really as long as you don't let the grass grow a foot high, I think most people could care less whether or not you had weeds in your lawn. It just seems like a poor trade off to me. A perfect and pretty lawn, but screw you cute little animals and kids.

Maybe my preference for having a weedy yard just comes from the fact that I grew up in a house where if we were to have gotten rid of the weeds in the front lawn, there would have been no front lawn at all. So, I really do heart weeds. I don't know, but suffice it say, I think treating your lawn is kind of selfish and highly unnecessary. Think of the CHILDREN people!